Yesterday, a hard reality hit home. When I needed to step up and care for my sick husband.
We're not sure exactly what happened (he was fine one minute and feeling quite sick the next), but it was pretty sudden and in the middle of the day. We'd had an enjoyable morning of going to see a movie (G-Force, really good if you like animated, weird, oddly funny stuff like us! just a note though: not all kids will really get it), eating lunch, and working on cleaning our cars. Then just suddenly he felt very sick. We can speculate as to what happened (and we don't think it's anything contagious), but while he was feeling better later last night, he slept horribly and stayed home sick today.
My husband is never sick. He's a little bit of a workaholic and just does not stay home sick. So it takes a lot to get him to that point and you know it's bad when he stays home.
You can imagine then that yesterday was a bit tricky for me. I did everything I could to maintain a good, caring spirit. Which admittedly can be very hard for me when I'm already feeling so miserable myself...and I shamefully was a bit of a grump at first. But I prayed about it and checked my attitude, and then I did as much for him as I could muster the energy and strength for, and it was quite taxing. But also being able to do anything for him at all was thrilling! I dearly love my husband and want to be able to care for him in this way. Especially now that he has to do so much more for me on a regular basis because of the Fibro (oh and then throw a cold or sinus infection or flu on top of that and I can't do anything!!). He is such a trooper...the least I can do is bring him the phone, more water, a blanket, turn down the a/c when he's sweating and turn it up when he's shivering, etc. After all, he does those things for me virtually every day! The problem is, that I'm already also "sick" with Fibro constantly, making this a clash of physical impossibilities.
So what do we do? Well, yesterday I had a spurt of energy that I can only imagine came from the Lord. Of which I am so thankful!
How do those of you with chronic illness manage this yourselves? What sorts of things are you able to push yourself to do? How do the rest of you "normal people" (for lack of a better term), when you are sick, manage to take care of your kids and husband despite it all? Does your hubby step up and handle things for you? Are you able to take care of stuff with kids and hubby even when you are feeling sick and miserable? I am just very curious...I honestly can't imagine days like this with children in the house, yikes. And how do those of you who are single and live without a roommate manage any of this at all? Not having someone nearby to grab something for you, get your medicine when you can't move, etc....? Or did you have to give in and get a roommate or move in with your parents? I hope you don't mind all the questions...I just think it's good to remember what others go through to keep ourselves in check and be thankful for what we do have, instead of feeling sorry for ourselves.
My fear with this is that whenever I'm taking care of him and the adrenaline rush of doing so is over, that I will find myself flat on my back in a bad flare-up or having caught whatever he had. I'm okay with that because I love him, but at the same time wrestle with knowing how to try to avoid that while still caring for him.
Obviously this is something I haven't quite figured out yet. It's tricky. Perhaps it's just another thing to chalk up to God's constant provision in our marriage/lives, that we can yield ourselves and patiently and compassionately care for one another even when we are feeling so dreary and miserable ourselves. It is, after all, in our greatest weakness that we can find the most strength in Him.
To God alone be the glory!