Fibro, Life, Bleh...

Tonight I feel miserable.

Physically I feel rotten. Emotionally I'm going downhill.

I feel like a failure at work, I can't possibly do everything I need to be doing at once. I screwed something up today. I feel inept and incapable.

After whipping up some very quick grilled cheese sandwiches, chips, and applesauce for dinner tonight, I fell apart on the couch, exhausted, and hubster wasn't even home to share in the dinner.

Hubster was running an errand with my car and getting gas for it. Getting gas has been its big issue for weeks now. Every time we think we have it fixed, it turns out it isn't fixed. It stalled at the gas station upon Tim putting gas in it and he had to wait about 15 minutes or so before he could drive away. Thankful he did this, but it was a rough day and a weird night.

I had a great weekend with my dad, and we had a lot of really good, deep, connecting conversations. It was therapeutic and wonderful. But now my mom & stepdad are coming this weekend and while I'm looking forward to it, I have no idea where one iota of energy is going to come from.

I'm trying really hard to get back into a solid workout routine. But the initial push always makes me exhausted and in horrific pain. This is how I feel today. The elevator is broken at work so even in my down, most-painful moments I don't have a back-up for getting around.

For tonight, I just have a bad attitude and am sulking. It's just what it is. I'll get over it.