I have a good friend that was in a bad car accident on Saturday, coming very close to losing her life, and yet God very much protected her & her unborn baby. They are both perfectly fine!!
I have another good friend struggling through the very difficult, very painful loss of her baby daughter who lived for just 6 hours in December. And the loss isn't even the worst of it, facing the reality of life beyond the loss is almost more painful than the loss itself.
I read a blog post tonight about a woman's husband's death at the end of December.
It all just really brings everything back into focus.
Life is so very precious.
I snuggle my little one tight. Even in the midst of hard days, teething, being so tired he just whines and cries all day. Even in the midst of more poopy diapers than I care to count, food wasted because he suddenly decides he doesn't want it even though he was crying with starvation-like cries moments earlier. Even in the midst of the whining that doesn't seem to cease all of a sudden. I don't want any of that to suck the joy out of my heart - the true joy of being a mom to this sweet and precious boy.
I am reminded to be a kinder, gentler, more supportive wife in the midst of the hard days. And a better mother.
Because I truly have no idea what's coming around the bend. None of us do. We could be gone in the next minute. We really need to stop running about our crazy lives like everything will fall apart if we don't get this thing done perfectly or if we don't look just a certain way.
Stop right now. Breathe deep. Listen to what's happening around you. And smile.
Because no matter what's happening in this moment, it is a moment to treasure as it will never come again.
I'm reading a book right now called Grace for the Good Girl by Emily Freeman. And it's so amazing. Exhilarating. And not the kind of book I can just tear through in a week. It takes me a while to soak in what she's saying because it's just hitting me in all the right places.
Where I'm reading currently (chapter 4), she talks about a friend's mother whose funeral she'd just gone to and she talks about how people said the lady fought cancer but never complained and no one knew how much she really suffered.
I honestly have no idea how anyone would do that.
I don't want to be known to be a grumbler or complainer, yet it's a lot of what I do. Not because I want to or mean to, it's just so easy to do. To focus on the negatives or the hardships.
It's so easy to be discontent and get stuck in a rut, and then the hardship someone else goes through makes yours look like a cakewalk and makes you stop and think.
Or something happens in our own lives that jolts us back to reality. Like my friend who was in the car accident was telling me. You can go about life as usual and then, wham.
The preciousness of life is brought back into view.
Wow, just wow.
I am so grateful for this life. This space to openly share my thoughts, whatever they may be. So grateful for God's grace and mercy, and the ways that he's shaping each of us every day.
2 comments:
thank you for your honesty. this calls to mind something someone said in a comment on my blog when i was pregnant with isaac... i had written a post about things i was experiencing in my own small world shortly after the tragedy of the tsunami in japan. i felt bad venting about what was going on with me and my pregnancy when women on the other side of the world had either lost their children or their unborn children were exposed to radiation. here is the post...
http://itsjusthowiseethings.blogspot.com/2011/04/oh-places-youll-go-and-other-dr-seuss.html
but then a wise woman i respect named tracey commented on my blog, and i will never forget what she said, because it is so true. here is what she wrote...
"G-What great words. My biggest heart lesson this past year is coming to know that every person has his/her journey and each one is just as important/valuable in the eyes of God--- whether it's a person fleeing from a tsunami or a woman blogging through her painful emotions. Humans put lesser value and weight to "tribulations" and compare them on a scale of suffering, but God does not. My concern about where my son is going to middle school is as important to him as the suffering of those in Japan. He knows our pain, great and small, and considers it worth attending to because it belongs to YOU, his child.
To believe this does not mean that I am invalidating the horrendous pain and suffering I see in Japan, it just means that I am not invalidating mine when I set it up in comparison. He never invalidates or belittles our pain.
I also think I am only just beginning to understand what it means when the Bible says we are to bear one another's burdens. We are a global family and we are to act in LOVE and concern when our brothers and sisters are hurting.
Your heart knows this and will be a blessing to your little child who will see a mama care for others in the way that she does.
xoxo
t
what she said about bearing one another's burdens... this is something i know you understand. i have watched you do it for me and for others. so you, in my eyes, are perfectly justified in expressing your pain and hardships, especially in the way you usually do... which is to still praise God in the midst and still trust him {thus your blog name!} and still recognize the suffering of others.
i remember so well those days you are talking about here... where isaac would spill food, waste food, do so many things that just taxed me to no end. they are hard days. no doubt about it. God gives us all what we need to get through all of what we face. That is the beauty. Some day, you may face immeasurable suffering... something you can't imagine now, just as you said here. If and when that time comes, God will give you what you need to stand through it, or his people to help hold you up when you can't stand through it. Thank you for being one who has stood with and for me these past many months. Love you tons!
G.
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