Saturday, April 23, 2011

How - with Fibromyalgia?

I've been asked by many how I do what I do with Fibromyalgia.

Especially after last weekend, running around like a chicken, helping to coordinate a wedding and overseeing a ton of details and people.

I'm not really sure how to respond to that. I think it's just like anyone else who has Fibro and works full-time. Has Fibro and kids. Has Fibro and travels for a living. Has Fibro and is always stressed out and on the go. Has cancer and presses on. Fights through multiple sclerosis.

Or any other list of rare, horrible, life-threatening, or disabling illnesses. How does anyone do it?

You often hear about people being a fighter or not letting go. I think there's something to be said for embracing life and refusing to let it get to us.

If I did what I felt like doing every day, I would never get out of bed. The pain is just more than I can bare in my human flesh. If I focused on the difficulties of life, I would sit around, depressed all day, locked up in my house, afraid to do anything for fear of hurting too badly, and would succumb to deep, dark depression.

Really...who wants that?! We already feel miserable every day, why allow ourselves to shirk away from everything and everyone every single day? That just makes us feel worse. It's a vicious cycle.

Each day I ask God for strength I do not possess. I cannot imagine just drowning in my sorrows and laying around each and every day.

But the sheer reality is that not every Fibro case is the same. Some people cannot leave their house. For some, it's so intense, they just literally don't know what else to do. In no way do I want to make those people feel worse or like somehow they aren't trying hard enough. That's simply not true.

I'm very thankful for what I do have and what God has allowed me to be able to do despite my illness. I'm not sure why it's varying degrees, but obviously God has a plan for each of us.

This is a big part of why you see me sharing so many details and pictures about my life. Because I want to embrace the life that God has given to me. After over two years of seeing my health decline rapidly, feeling the pain & fatigue increase, and watching myself slowly deplete to a near shell of a human being... I knew I had to try to do something.

I'm so grateful that it worked, because it doesn't for everyone with Fibro. The truth is, many live shattered lives, in darkness, depression, and feeling overwhelmed that this is all their lives have become. I really want to encourage those people to fight, to not give up hope, to keep searching.

But ultimately, the only true hope can be found in Jesus Christ. No matter what I think I can do on my own, the truth is I can do nothing without him. No matter who I think I am or should be, the truth is I am no one without him.

He is who makes me who I am and makes me capable of what I can do.

I honestly don't know how people do this without him. For me, he is everything.