Sunday, April 21, 2013

Reality

I am so exhausted.

Drained.

Overwhelmed.

Anxious.

Panicked.

And yet also freakishly calm when I'm having a rational moment.

Water-logged.

Chicago's flooding of a few days ago has left disaster in its wake. Directly effecting my beloved workplace in devastating ways.

Stressed out to the max.

Overwhelmed is really an understatement.

Brain explosions occurring from a breastfeeding class, childbirth class, and a Baby Fest at our local library. All done in the past week. All leaving in their wake huge amounts of information to go through.

So many conversations over the past couple of weeks between me and hubster. So. many.

Crazy amounts of huge decisions.

A house that refuses to just get up and organize itself.

Fear of the unknown threatens to envelop me.

But given the amount of information I've learned in my 12.5 years of preparing for a child... I'm actually really okay for the significant amount of info I knew going into this.

This week starts my once-a-week doctor's appointments up until baby arrives. They're keeping a close eye on me for a variety of reasons. I'm actually okay with this at this point.

One big fear is bed rest or baby coming super early. So knowing week-by-week that baby is okay, that's a good thing.

Ultimately I know God's in control and I trust him. That's really what I need to stay focused on.

I'm trying....


[Sorry this blog has suddenly become very much a pregnancy / children blog. I'm sorry, and yet also kinda not. Please bear with me....]

2 comments:

Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell said...

Don't apologize for the direction your blog has taken. It SHOULD reflect your life!

Future of Hope said...

Hang in there! And in the midst of all the craziness, just remember that God has already written all the days for your little boy. There never has been another baby like him, and there never will be. Read Psalm 139 often; reflect and rest in the Father Who is lovingly perfecting the details of your baby.