Except that it doesn't go away.
You can't have a good cry and walk back into your normal life and feel like things are going to be okay and go away.
They aren't. They just aren't.
You can push through it to an extent and endure the good days, but the good days aren't like other people's good days.
They're really tough.
Dealing with this is hard. It's exhausting. It's mind-numbing pain & fatigue.
It really wears you down because it's so taxing. It takes a lot out of you emotionally.
Every. single. day.
You're emotionally spent - even on the 'good' days.
You try really hard to just push on, but it's hard.
And then if you push too hard, you'll have a flare-up.
If you push to some extent, but your body suddenly decides not to like it, you can be bedridden for days.
Whether it's a good day or a bad day, I'm never 100% anymore. That's what chronic illness does to you. It zaps a bit of life from you.
As Mark Driscoll told us at our marriage conference this weekend:
"The hardest missions are for the best soldiers. God is honoring you and trusting you with that."
I'm trying really hard to remember that. God wants to use this to honor me and to honor him.
One thing I am continuing to learn each new day is that God's grace is sufficient for me. His strength is made perfect in my weakness.
One thing I am continuing to learn each new day is that God's grace is sufficient for me. His strength is made perfect in my weakness.
When my body can't take moving one more inch, He carries me through.
I had a great conversation over lunch with my friend Monica, who always helps inspire me. I want to give credit where credit is due, this topic came out of that time with her!
1 comment:
Alright! We have a Chicago fan here! My husband is an avid Chicago fan-Bulls, Cubs and whatever else there is. I think he has even started watching hockey. He has loved Chicago team since he was young and has followed them all these years.
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